Let’s be honest — if someone isn’t calling, it’s not because Mercury’s in retrograde. It’s not your aura, your energy, or your phone number’s numerology. Sometimes, he’s just not calling. Period. So before you start changing your whole life — or worse, your phone number — take a breath.
And then, there’s that phrase. The one you hear every time you’ve survived another tragic date or a relationship that barely made it past brunch:
“Love comes when you least expect it.”
Oh, does it? Because I’ve “least expected it” a thousand times, and still ended up with weird text exchanges and emotional support ice cream.
But fine. Let’s give these sayings a chance — maybe they just need a little rebranding. A Scent of Singles twist, if you will.
1. “Everything happens in its time.”
Cute. But when exactly is that time?
Scent of Singles version:
“Everything happens in its time… apparently the universe loves a good drama before delivering love.”
Because yes, timing is everything – but the universe seems to enjoy giving you a few plot twists first.
2. “Your soulmate is your other half.”
Let’s be clear, ladies – no one came out of the womb half a person. You’re not a pizza slice waiting to be completed. You’re a whole damn meal.
Scent of Singles version:
“Other half? I’ve been running this show solo just fine.”
Because real love isn’t two broken pieces desperately clicking together – it’s two complete humans who choose to add flavor to each other’s lives.
3. “The one will find you.”
Oh, will he now?
Scent of Singles version:
“True love will find you… right after you stop chasing it and start living your best life.”
Love doesn’t need GPS. It just needs you to stop staring at your phone, obsessing over messages, or overthinking every text. Focus on yourself, enjoy your life, and let the world keep spinning – love will come when it actually makes sense, not when you’re stressing over it.
4. “Don’t settle.”
Classic advice, but in reality, “don’t settle” sometimes feels like a full-time job — one you’re never quite promoted from.
Scent of Singles version:
“Don’t settle – unless it’s for someone who can survive your burnt morning scrambled eggs, your blasting Madonna sing-alongs in the shower, and your glow-in-the-dark sleep mask.”
The point is, you deserve someone (or something) that truly makes you happy. But that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy life’s quirks and little chaos along the way. Keep your standards high, your sarcasm sharper than ever, and never underestimate the power of someone who can laugh at all your weirdness.
5. “Patience is a virtue.”
Ah yes – the classic advice people give when they’ve already found their person and now think they’re Buddha.
Scent of Singles version:
“Patience is a virtue… especially when love’s busy ghosting everyone else.”
You don’t need monk-level patience to survive the single era – just enough humor to laugh at how weird modern dating can get. Patience isn’t about waiting quietly; it’s about living loudly while the universe finishes its little side quest of sending you someone decent.
6. “Love is blind.”
Cute, poetic… and slightly concerning.
If love’s blind, then what’s our excuse?
Scent of Singles version:
“They say love is blind – and honestly, that explains a lot of my exes.”
Blind love makes for great movie plots, but in real life, it’s better to keep your eyes open. See people for who they are, not who you want them to be. Romantic? Sure. Realistic? Absolutely.
7. “You’ll be ready when you least expect it.”
A comforting phrase that usually appears right when you feel most unready — probably crying on the bathroom floor in your oldest hoodie.
Scent of Singles version:
“You’re ready for love… the universe just wants to see how dramatic you can get first.”
Readiness doesn’t come from perfection. It comes when you finally stop begging life to look a certain way — and start laughing at the mess instead. That’s when love sneaks in… somewhere between your sarcasm and your skincare routine.
8. “Soulmates complete each other.”
Ah yes, the Hollywood version of love – where someone magically fills every missing piece of your puzzle.
Scent of Singles version:
“Soulmates don’t complete you – they just clap the loudest while you do your own thing.”
The truth? You’re already whole. The right person doesn’t fix your cracks; they admire how you filled them yourself. And that, my friend, is real chemistry.
9. “Time heals everything.”
Really? Because my dishes are still waiting.
Scent of Singles version:
“Time heals everything… mostly my patience, my wrinkles, and the soft little souvenirs forming around my waist.”
The truth? Time doesn’t erase – it softens. It stretches, reshapes, and turns heartbreak into hindsight (and maybe a few laugh lines). And honestly? I’ll take the laugh lines.
10. “You have to put yourself out there.”
Classic advice – though in modern dating, it feels more like emotional cardio.
Scent of Singles version:
“Put yourself out there… just don’t forget your self-respect, your sarcasm, and maybe a little Pinot Noir.”
Explanation:
Being open is great, but don’t lose yourself in the process. If you’re already “out there,” at least bring some self-irony and a glass of wine – it’s essential survival gear in the dating world.
Final Thoughts
Being single isn’t a holding pattern – it’s your own highlight reel.
You’re not missing a piece; you’re a full puzzle, still adding extra glitter.
Old sayings weren’t wrong, just… slightly behind the times.
The modern single woman doesn’t need another “hang in there” quote – she needs sass, snacks, and perspective.
Love’s not avoiding you – it’s just letting you enjoy your main character moment first.
So live boldly. Laugh at the clichés. And when love eventually shows up, it’ll probably find you exactly where it’s supposed to:
thriving, glowing, and armed with sarcasm.
